What a Week!

It's Friday morning, and I'm pausing for a moment to catch my breath after a very busy week. I sort of feel like I woke up on Monday morning to find myself strapped to a rollercoaster, and I've been holding on tight and trying to enjoy the ride ever since.

All week long I've had the honor of spontaneous times with people at Hope as they've shared their thoughts, questions, struggles, and triumphs. (Hey, rollercoasters are always more fun when you're sitting with people you know.) It's part of what I really love about being a pastor, because I get to be close to folks at the very time that God is doing the most amazing things in their lives -- opening their eyes to truth, peeling away past layers of defensiveness, empowering them to make significant changes, helping them to enjoy his wondrous grace. At times it can be draining because there's always an intensity involved, but it is also refreshing and humbling.

However, there have been some significant lows this week as well. I started out Monday by completing a deposition to provide testimony in a lawsuit taking place between an individual in Arizona and Compass, our former church. I've been so reluctant to voluntarily participate in this because my interactions with the church's attorney and the plaintiff have left me convinced that neither side has done everything possible to resolve the matter according to the principles of scripture (check out 1 Corinthians 6 sometime). I spoke with Pastor Tim at Compass last week -- a really great guy, and I'm thrilled God has called him there as their shepherd -- and I totally understand and sympathize with everyone's hesitation to simply talk with one another now that insurance companies and lawyers are involved. But I'm still saddened that the legal systems of man gets in the way of the simple, loving communication and reconciliation that should be the hallmark of true fellowship. In the end, I became convinced that the best thing I could do to get this dispute settled (and to avoid the threat of getting subpoena and being forced to travel to Arizona for trial) was to sign the depostion and move out of the way. I've wrestled all week with whether or not this amounts to a compromise of my ethics, and I'm not feeling good about the answer.

This week has also been one of those "practice what you preach" opportunities. We've been talking at Hope about the amazing grace of God and what it means to live together as a community of grace and truth, transparency and accountability, patience and courage. I should have realized that God wouldn't waste any time in providing settings to put all of that into practice. People who know me well realize that I totally hate the anticipation of confronting someone regarding sin; I find myself wrestling with my own inadequacies and failings, and I become apprehensive of all the possible "what if" situations that might come out of even the most loving confrontation. So there were a couple of times this week when I felt positively nauseous, and I skipped out on several hours of much-needed sleep in exchange for praying, relfecting, and rehearsing important conversations in my mind. I just wanted God to be honored, and for him to clearly lead the process. Of course, when we do things God's way -- when we courageously and lovingly function as a community of grace -- the Lord works wonders. And as I look back on a couple of difficult conversations this past week, I feel this sense of satisfaction that God was delighted and that everyone responded with a desire to move closer to the Lord. Really good stuff!

Also, I don't think I've ever been prouder of a church leadership team than I have been this past week. Our Elders stepped up to the plate in an extraordinary demonstration of wisdom and compassion, and our Administrative Team continues to be knit together in a way that makes their task both productive and refreshing. God is doing tremendous things among the leaders of Hope, and I'm so excited to see what else he has in store for us. It's an incredible honor to serve alongside these amazing men and women!

This week has also brought the honor of preparing for Peggy Ward's memorial service. What a blessing to sit with Susan Alexander and her sisters just to listen to them reflect on their mother's life. All three have such beautiful, gentle spirits, and the warm, tender stories just flowed. I'm looking forward to celebrating her life with the family on Monday.

Early in the week we decided to interrupt the message series from the book of Galatians to consider a specific opportunity for applying the principles of self-sacrifice that we talked about last Sunday. I spent more time than usual preparing for this week because there's so much information that could be shared and because I wanted to provide as condensed and accurate a portrayal of the subject as possible. Now that the preparation is complete, I'm really looking forward to this weekend.

I'm also looking forward to leading the celebration of communion not only at Hope on Sunday but also for the Tres Dias team as we continue our every-other-week preparation meetings in anticipation of another incredible guys' retreat in April. And as I considered what I'd say, God struck me with a perspective that I haven't considered in a while: Why in the world would Jesus -- the most unforgettable and pivotal individual in the history of the world -- have to instruct us to remember him? As if anyone could actually forget Jesus!

As I head into the weekend, my schedule is still full to overflowing. I don't think it will let up until I go to bed Monday night. But I'm already planning on taking next Tuesday off simply to sleep in, recharge my batteries, and refresh my soul. Unfortunately, I think I've picked up something from my daughters this morning; shortly after I arrived at the office, I was struck with intense nausea. I've already made two trips to the bathroom to make sure none of my breakfast remained in my stomach. Bleh! Oh, Father, now just isn't a good time to be sick! I've got a lot to do over the next few days! I guess it's another opportunity to trust him, his timing, and his ability to do great things in the midst of our own weakness.

Oh yes, one last thought. Did you see this week's episode of Lost? Wow! Just when I thought the show couldn't get any more myserious and engaging, the writers returned to their successful formula of giving us some pretty big answers only to surround them with even bigger questions. We're loving this show!