Tres Dias

On Thursday afternoon, Frankie & Nikki Stamps picked me up at my home and launched me on the amazing experience that is Tres Dias. I spent the weekend discovering the grace of God in a powerful, almost indescribable way. Together with a group of other men, we listened as guys shared their own journeys and discoveries. We worshiped. We laughed. We cried. We learned. But most of all, we experienced an expression of Christ-like love that totally blew me away.
I had a pretty good idea of what God had in store for me this weekend. As I shared in church a few weeks ago, I struggled all summer about teaching through the story of Joseph this fall. The experiences of Joseph we so often brought to mind throughout the difficult season in our lives that led us from our friends in Arizona to our new friends in Virginia. I've lost track of how many nights I lay awake all last Fall and Winter with God pulling my heart into the pages of Genesis and the rollercoaster life of Joseph. The story is still very emotional for me, and I have yet to share with anyone (beyond Margo) the full implications of what God was bringing about in my life. I find myself getting choked up every time I start talking about what I learned (and am still learning!) from Joseph, and I think it's God's great sense of humor that led our children to be a part of the production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat just before moving to Virginia.

So I decided I would avoid preaching on this subject for a while -- at least until the emotions were not so fresh, and the wounds had stopped hurting, and I could fully embrace the "happily ever after" ending of the story. But God had other plans. The more I tried to develop a different sermon series for this Fall, the more I realized I had no choice. God wanted me to dive back into Joseph's story, and to be vulnerable with our church family.

As I planned out the series, I realized that there needed to be a week in which I took some pretty big risks and laid a lot of stuff out there for everyone to see. There's no way I can begin to explain the power of this story without sharing my own story. It's the week I've anticipated the most, and I admit that I've been a bit fearful because I just haven't felt ready to open up that way yet. The week I was scheduled to reach that point in the story was October 14, this past Sunday.

But God, in his amazing grace, had other plans. He arranged for me to spend the weekend at the Tres Dias retreat. And once I realized the timing of the event, I began preparing my heart for what I knew God had in store. In that setting, all that God has been trying to teach me this past year -- all the refinement of my own character, all my struggles with forgiving the people who withheld God's love and scarred my family, all the cautious, defensive, deep, secret fears and sorrows and hungers of my soul -- it all came rushing to the surface. It was almost overwhelming. And yet God also arranged for all of this to take place in a setting where I would be surrounded by countless expressions of love and kindness and encouragement and blessing. For three days, the surprises and grace and true-Christlike tenderness that my spirit craved was showered upon us. Each hour it kept getting better and better, and still we were told to wait... we hadn't seen anything yet.

By the end of the weekend, I can now say with all confidence that I have encountered Christ, I have surrendered the heartaches, I have released the hurtful people to God's mercy whether they ever realize what they've done or not, I have been wrapped in the beauty of God's love and the compassion of his people, I have felt the transforming power of his Spirit, and I walk forward in grace alone.

Now I'm ready to share my story, and I'm looking forward to a very intimate, transparent experience with my brothers and sisters at Hope this weekend.

I wish I could share more. I wish I could write down all the details of so many moments of wonder and miracle. But part of the Tres Dias experience is the surprise of how God's grace unfolds during the weekend. And since Margo is heading for her own Tres Dias in two weeks, and since I hope to share this experience with other brothers and sisters in the years ahead, it's best I just smile silently and pray for others who will discover for themselves whatever God may have in store for their own adventure.

I am so grateful to my family at Hope for allowing me to be away this past weekend, and I am deeply appreciative of Pastor John Kuvakas for coming and sharing his heart from Psalm 23 in my place this past Sunday (especially considering how he was feeling physically). And I don't have words to express how thankful I am for the many people who prayed for me, ministered to me, served me, listened to me, embraced me, encouraged me, and so much more. You know who you are, and I truly love you with the love of our Savior.

Please join me in praying for my wife and the other women who will be stepping into the engulfing grace of God in a couple of weeks, and for the many people who have already been at work for months preparing that experience. I can't wait for Margo to come home so that we can share all of the wonders and surprises and moments of blessing.